The regrets begin


My eldest son went to Queensland to see what it was like and whether he was going to want to come eventually.  He took off on a plane and disappeared for a few months.On arrival back in September 2011 it appeared that he had carried over some exams and that he had missed a vital chance in finishing his degree.  Had he remained in Scotland and my wish for all things Australian not been so great I think he may have passed. He appealed his course but eventually was told he could not rejoin and after three years was asked to leave. But who knows? He may have failed anyway even if he had been there for the resit.


My husband's son had gone into hiding and refused to visit us from his mother's house in England and only communicated intermittently. Only surfacing every so often to tell us that "He didn't like the heat."


My husband's daughter cried every time we saw her while her boyfriend tried to console her.


My mother was determined to come to Australia so that she wouldn't be on her own and promptly put her house up for sale against all our advice.


Friends tried to hide their disappointment at the thought of never seeing us again.  Crushing their plans of retiring together and going off for the weekend was disappearing. 


But it would be okay - we were going to Australia the Land of Opportunity and the weather would be fantastic and see us through everything.


My husband's parents were stoic and told us that we were doing the right thing.


We continued packing, clearing, painting, repairing  through all of this.  Never quite committing to anything as we were going to be off soon.


In reality - two years had passed and some of our life had been put on hold so that we could follow our dream.


We both were stuck in a rut in our jobs and so we thought this would be the Holy Grail.


Finally we were granted our visa. We were so relieved, we could leave and start the next phase of our lives at 51 and 53. When the time came to give my notice - I thought I would be ecstatic - in truth, I was unsure, depressed about having to start again and leaving a familiar routine.  But I still said I would be leaving.  


Our world came crashing in a few weeks later when our daughter was diagnosed with a life threatening kidney disease which brought all of us to our knees.  We couldn't understand any of it - it was genetic - our parents were still living.  My mum was just about to celebrate her 80th birthday.  Stuart's parents were both going strong at 76 and 78.  It got worse we were told that we were the carriers and that in all likelihood one of us also had the kidney disease which eventually means your kidneys fails when transplant is the only option.


We had already given our notice to our employers, the container was booked and job confirmed.  The next few weeks were a round of hospital appointments with our daughter, her blood pressure was sky high.  Our daughter, the fit swimmer and runner was now too tired to get up the stairs.